Yet another year has passed!

One thing I’ve learnt in my 30’s, you rarely wake up one morning to suddenly notice life-altering transformations in yourself. Our identities and personalities gradually shift, accumulating into new contours and taking up new shapes and forms. It’s only when we stop years later and look back that we notice all of the dramatic changes that have taken place. Changes are done in moderate fashion, for improvement, whether in personal life or at work. 

It’s impossible to identify which exact moments or days shaped you to become who you are. It is every conversation, interaction, decision, success, and failure that you experience over the years which slowly mould you into the person you are today. 

But in these past couple of years, I have been building my life in a deliberate fashion, more conscious than I ever was. Perhaps this has slowed me down to a certain extent, but perhaps it has sped me up as well. It is hard to tell sometimes, without the results sometimes showing immediately, to know whether you are doing the correct thing or not. 

I guess that is why instant gratification is what a lot of people desire, as it indicates that you are ‘on the right track’. 

To have long term plans, delayed gratification, is beyond most people. They want to see results from their efforts, to have validation. But that just does not make sense to me sometimes. I mean, a person gets promoted because they are good. Not that they get promoted then they become good. So in the grand scheme of things, so what if you got a compliment, or a nicer car, or closed a sale? Does that make you a better person, wealthier person, more capable person? No. 

You became a better person, wealthier person or more capable person, that’s why you could get a compliment, a nicer car or close a sale. I don’t understand people who don’t understand this concept, who don’t have this thought deeply entrenched in their thoughts and have it reflected in their actions. 

Oh well, I don’t need the world to understand me or be the same as everyone else. I just need the right people around me, to believe in my way of living and be supportive of me.

As I mentioned, whether I am on the right track or not, to slow things down, to understand and to learn in-depth about everything I am doing, to plan and to consider, with a longer time horizon than the norm, it is hard to tell. But since I believe that l have more than half my life ahead of me, I am but an infant and still a student of life. I’m just gonna trudge along and continue the path that I believe in. Taking note of my age as just a marker for my journey. 

Thank you for all the love and support from all my people. Thank you for all the personal messages and kindness from all of you. Having faith and trust in me is tougher than in most. But I believe having the correct input will create the correct output. If not sooner, then later.

PS: Sorry, I don’t have photos with many of you this year. Blame Mr Covid.